For now, I just wanted to share a great song that just made me cry. "It's Not" by Aimee Mann is not a new song, but it's an extremely powerful one about addiction, and longing, and isolation.
I don't know why this song just had me crying exactly, but it just hit me so hard. Sometimes with art I connect so strongly with what someone is saying, and feel it so deeply in my soul.
I am actually not a drug addict, or a drinker, but I have spent much of my life trying to run away from my problems. And I am no stranger to addictive behaviors.
Here are the absolutely perfect lyrics, by the incredible Aimee Mann:
I keep going round and round on the same old circuit
A wire travels underground to a vacant lot
Where something I can't see interrupts the current
And shrinks the picture down to a tiny dot
And from behind the screen it can look so perfect
But it's not
So here I'm sitting in my car at the same old stop light
I keep waiting for a change but I don't know what
So red turns into green turning into yellow
But I'm just frozen here on the same old spot
And all I have to do is to press the pedal
But I'm not
People are tricky you can't afford to show
Anything risky anything they don't know
The moment you try - well kiss it goodbye
So baby kiss me like a drug, like a respirator
And let me fall into the dream of the astronaut
Where I get lost in space that goes on forever
And you make all the rest just an afterthought
And I believe it's you who could make it better
Though it's not
No it's not...
No it's not...
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